Season Ending Match Recap - Round 5 Match 3 (12/2/2021)

 

Weekly Recap

Season Ending Match - Round 5 Match 3

12/2/2021

 

Scores:

Harper Valley PTA           vs           Shake and Bake              

Jon / Russell                      Buddy / Fair        6-4,6-7,6-3

Battle of the heavy weights.  And not saying this just because Fair spent a week at the hunting camp eating and drinking.  Swami witnessed some high-powered MPH’s on the show court.  Even witnessed a Bo Jackson reenactment (see broken racket pic).   No Sampson let down from Buddy the Elf after getting that hair cut either.  Your Dad would be proud.  The Elf brought out his Pro Tour mojo and played like money was on the line.  Don’t believe we had any takers at even odds.  So just bragging rights, and a title on the line.  Great tennis by this foursome that went three sets again…so, assuming Same Bat Time and Same Bat Channel next week.  Unless…   

Ps.  Seen Russ skipping leg day again in the club on Monday.  Was that a yoga mat you were carrying?  C’mon Man…Buddy and the Ego ain’t losing to no hot yoga regular!

Addison / Brent                Eddie / Gordo    7-6,4-6,6-2

So much for the switch-a-roo at line two giving an easy four to HVPTA.  Shake and Bake not conceding anything.  Pushed to the brink on set one and a tightly contested set two this match almost gave the PTA captain a heart attack not to mention surprising a few onlookers.  Geecko and Fast Eddie gave Addi and the Tuth a run for their money that’s for sure.  Word is Addi stepped it up in set #3.  Wondering who will show up next week.  Glad to know 3.5 Addi is still making appearances 😊 .  Valiant effort from the Shake and Bake duo, but even a slightly gimpy Tuth is still a tough out.  May have just cemented himself as MVP front runner.  Sorry Bo!    Raised a few questions about this pairing going into next week…aka.. health of the Tuth and a not so effective pairing with the streaky coon-ass.  Back to the drawing board TT.  Let’s give the crowd what they have been asking for…and if it can’t be the young guns vs. the dynamic duo it has to be the tuth vs. the Saint of St. Bernard!  Draft positions be damned…

Shane /Nick                       B III / Donald      6-3,6-4

We needed Mariano Rivera in his prime and got Charlie Sheen post firing from two and a half men.  No Winning from Dr. Tim’s replacement on this night.  Not sure if Sneaky Pete could have made a difference.  Will Tonkin T keep this pairing or will Tricky find his way back to the Tuth.  And why was he practicing with Skinny Legs on Tuesday.  Very formidable at line 3 but shouldn’t Nick be playing line 2.   Doug may want to consider Lil Nadal in this spot for the play off.  Lil Nadal has a history of beating Nick in winner take all matches and has an 88% winning percentage against him on Monday evenings.  Time to shake up the world.    

Tyler / Ronny                    Tony / Doug       6-1,6-3

Swami’s early predictions proved accurate with two-win prediction for Shake and Bake prior to Thursday’s start time.  Word has it that there was one loser and one winner on the betting line Thursday.  Glad someone was smart enough to bet on the Prince.  With Line three going to HIVPTA, Shake and Bake needed this one to force the play off.  Swami avoids Pete Rose comparisons but regretting not betting on himself.  Bogalusa Doug comes through again and works the cockamamie scoring system to perfection.  Most thought this one would be “Close”.  Captain vs. Captain!  7^th rounder vs. 7^th rounder.  But, close on paper can’t measure competitiveness.  Dominated early by the Shake and Bake twosome, HIVPTA gains short lived momentum in the 2^nd going up 3-0 only to lose 6 games straight.  Hopes for outright title dissipates and Ronny’s Come Back Shane battle cry goes unanswered.   THC Grin was all smiles after the match as another Captain vs. Captain match up goes his way.   Does Tokin Tyler ride off into the sunset with this defeat, or does he re-insert himself back into the line up to claim bragging rights.  Swami knows what he would do but since this guy isn’t from St. Bernard, I’m thinking he bows out.  Swami knows one more thing…Bogalusa Doug will be representing his team and playing in the Title match come Thursday. 

Hal / Eckholdt                   Thomas / Vic      7-6,6-4

Three of four needing to play to get in required number of matches made for an interesting match-up and the crowd seemed to love it.  Nice crowd in attendance for a Wednesday too.  These four played their hearts out and the fans witnessed some great tennis.  First set was a toss-up.  Swami believes Shake and Bake may have done better in the 2^nd if they had one the first.  Weighted down by anticipating a third set not kind on the psyche for tired legs.   Vicious Vic’s Volleys kept them in it early.  Doc Eck rallys were tiring just to watch.  Young Lefties pace on his topspin forehands were impressive.  But, Shallow Hal’s consistent Slices and Lobs was the real difference maker.  Nice choice as Doc Eck’s partner Tyler.  Win by HIVPTA ensured both teams were tied heading into Thursday’s end of the season match up.  Would have been a different story had SB taken a four-point lead with 14 points up for grab.

 

Lumber Jocks     vs           One Bourbon    

Bo / Jennings                     Kenny / Paul       6-4,6-4

Brad / Butcher                  JA / Parnell          6-0,4-6,6-1

Jeff / Kobrock                    Billy / Robby       6-0.6-4

Skip / Schneider                               Mesa/ Bentley   2-6,6-4,6-1

Ananth / Mount                              Toups / Todd      6-4,6-1

 

This one had no bearing on final standings so Swami’s cutting it short and going back to work.

Here’s a few quick hitters so Paulie don’t complain:

Paul steps into line one and shows Being Bo Markovic what a Tomahawk slice overhead looks like.

Jennings not getting style points with this victory even though this twosome is undefeated.  Last three were cakewalks so MVP candidacy in jeopardy with hollow W’s.

Kenny O gets badge of honor award for playing with vocally challenged captain Paul.

Lopsided set scores for JA/Parnell match means 2^nd set must have been a fluke. 

Billy loses again.  Damn Willy!  Can’t blame this one on Precious Paul.

Old Knees Harvey finally gets into the Win column.  Brings Mesa along for the ride.  Nothing easy against Sly Schneider and Damn Skippy so good win Commish.

Another loss for Rockin Toupsie!  Did he really win a match earlier in the season? 

Ananth may have committed Hari kari if he would have lost this one.  Is that politically incorrect? 

Dave can we get an over and under bet on the books re. Todd catching his serve next time.  Oh wait…that will have to wait Till Bentleague VIII.

 

Where are the individual stats Hefty Lefty?  Need more material and too lazy to add it all up manually.

 

Lagniappe:

Will the two captains play this one according to draft position?

Magic number is 8 points to win since Commish changed the effing scoring system.  First time Swami can think of where rules were altered heading into a playoff. Last I checked, soccer goals were still 1, touch downs were six, and baskets in basketball were still 1, 2, or 3 depending on distance and foul shots.  Unfathomable you might say or cockamamie if you are searching for words to describe the Commish’s decision to change to the infamous cockamamie scoring system! At least we won’t have another Tie but it diminishes line 5 yet again.  Most would have picked lines, games, won and lost.  This change alone justifies all the complaints about the scoring system and allowing Effing 1^st pick overall Bo to garner >50% of his team’s points.  You too Mr. Ed(ney).

How confident can Tyler be in his top two picks having just seen them lose against the SB Line 1 pairing?  Will Tyler let Doug have all the (guts and) glory of winning (while  playing) in the final line up and concede to his teammates’ demands and put himself on the bench.  Will Ditch and Dive come across the lake to watch if he is not in the line-up or just phone it in and begin his sabbatical? 

Will Ronny’s cries of “come back Shane” get heard? 

Will Shake and Bake’s 2^nd Round selection give them more than one victory this year? 

 

Will Tigah finally get a chance to earn more than two-points and who will his partner be? 

Will Burrito McQuaid, Svelt Mtch, or Sundial get tapped for Championship Thursday or does Dine and Dash stick with Shallow Hal for an encore appearance? 

Will Shake and Bake’s injured players heal up in time to be a factor. 

The answers to these questions and more will be answered Thursday night.

Bring the whiskey but don’t let Miss B see ya!  

 

Commissioner’s Corner:

Gents,  Well the regular season is complete but still no Champion!  With Shake & Bake and Harper Valley tied up we'll have one more match next Thursday night at 6:00 to decide the winner.  We've agreed to change line 5 to 1 point to be sure we'll get a winner and 5 doubles matches will be full third sets.  

 

 

Standings:

Lumber Jocks	131
Shake and Bake	138
Harper Valley PTA	138
One Bourbon	73