Bentleague IX: Parabellum - Draft Analysis

bentleague IX Draft analysis By the STBernard Swam Let the games begin! —— NetProphets Captain George Russell Anderson - Consensus Number 1 with the weight of a draft day trade on his shoulders. Can justify best team money can buy if he performs and lives up to his billing. Hopefully off season yoga training pays off. Shane McCarthy - everyone knows he is more athletic than he looks. Won’t be surprising anyone any more. This time will have to rise up as second round selection. Hope the serve is second round worthy for George’s sake. Jay Butcher - Candlestick battling injuries according to the Swami so hard to validate early third round selection. Swami says if plan B is the two handed back hand Captain George will regret this one. Pulling for you JB. Hate to see injuries. Foresee some broken rackets in his future if Plan b materializes. Addison Melancon - 5.0 Addi or 3.5 Addi? Captain hoping for the Addi of two years ago. The Cajun Coonass can hang athletically but can he hang against the more cerebral players. Swami likes this pick, but you better put him on a curfew for early Saturday matches. He’s been known to barf in between sets on Saturday mornings. Mitch Tucker - Self rated much lower so even he was surprised by early 5th round selection. The only consistent part of his game is his inconsistency. When he is on Swami says his net game is one of the best …but it isn’t , he isn’t ..,.Looking forward to round five challenges this year for bragging rights! well you know the rest. Jawn Priola - the Chris Carter of tennis. All he does is score touch downs! All the butter bean of Pac does is win in Bentleague. Usually against lower round competition so will need to transfer pickle ball prowess to the tennis court this year. Eddie Burdette - racked up points in previous seasons with a much lower draft spot. Swami doesn’t doubt the forehand but will need better net play to compete at line 3 or 4. Looking forward to Eddie and the cruisers on higher lines this year. Bill Speiss - Swami predicting good things for free Willy this year. Will relish lower round selection and feast on round 5 competition if he gets the gummy dose right. Please help him keep score if you are on the court with him. Eric Daigle - Swami reserves judgement on ninth round selection because of the lack of exposure …but last name indicates possible talent. Not sure what sport though! Rocky Payne - welcome back to B league Rocky. Angry American will have to find suitable partner to make a difference and Captain George may have a challenge doing that. Play nice Rocky and wins will come. Ty Miller - guessing game continues. Who are these new guys and can they play the late match on a Thursday while other players are heckling right next to the court? CJ Merle - The not as old as he looks 12th rounder may surprise the competition and win some points with the right match up. Looking across the draft line Swami cannot believe the former Tinder Stud is on the same line as CJ. Don Sharman - Sharman sounds like a good tennis name but looking across his draft line it sounds more like a golf name than a tennis name. Is he as athletic as the other three? Paul Eskine - the vocally challenged one aka the Coach Killer. Has the game to score points but Swami believes that is not always high on his list of priorities. One good cut serve and he thinks his day is complete. Chris Coinon - will live in infamy for his reply to all re. Ananth. Will get a chance to prove Indian Lives matter if he can score some points. Pressure is on to deliver in Ananth’s absence! Ernie Anderson - Is a father son match on the horizon? Swami loves his game and round 16 selection. Opponents better make him move to disrupt his consistent play. Will be an asset when the weather gets cooler. Dave Mount - Trumpet playing tennis player has the fundamentals to beat the competition at this spot. Swami says this guy needs to add a fitness regiment to his daily routine to increase success. Dave and Danny Butler - Brother duo will have to score points to warrant consideration as “best brother combo” against others in this league ie Priola’s and Allen’s. Let the judgement begin. Swami Says Draft Grade A- Three top selections in first nine after buying Russell. Should pay dividends if George got it right! — Lobbyist captain Jay Blossman Had a plan an executed it! Now it’s up to us to perform. He makes plans and executes them unlike someone else we know.. Good job Jaybo! Went with consensus number two pick and put some extra coins in his pocket simultaneously. Already a winner. Noah Marquez - Swami hopes the newlywed is available each week. If so should vie for MVP honors. Swami likes how he makes his partners better. Should pair nicely with Jeff and Chris. And the Prince of the Parish if the Captain wants spread out the talent. Chris Kobrock - some were surprised by early 2nd round selection including yours truly. Has been on a steady rise for two seasons so no one should be really surprised getting his name called early. If he plays like he did Tuesday his Captain will be thrilled. Jeff Thompson - Part of the Beau Chen connection driving a lot of decisions for the Lobbyist. Swami believes this one is a sure thing. The puppet master primed for a breakout year if peripheral distractions Dont creep in. Mark Schneider - Sly Schneider also on the rise. Will need all the tricks in his bag to run with line one and two. Will his game translate into W’s at this level. Captain Jay is confident it will. Tigah Priola - to talk the talk you have to be able to walk the walk! Time to put all the off-season rehab to the test, earn Lil Nadal Nick name, and score points. Robby Economedies- Jay may have just won the league with picks 6 through 8. Swami sees this group dominating against similar round picks. If engaged and focused ADHD Econo can play up on lines better than most. Robert Groenveld - Has been a point earning machine in past leagues and Swami believes that will continue. May even play some at line one because he practices against similar talent. Great value at 7! Swami loves this pick for Captain Jay. Peter Jilkov - the Mad Bulgarian is the sleeper pick of B IX. Should earn numerous points for Captain Jay. Swami sees Peter surprising folks across his line with a Kobrock like forehand. Paired with Lil Nadal in pre season match with exceptional results. Swami predicts More to come. Greg Eckholdt - Doc Eck will score more points than his across the line mates. You hear that Commish. He’ll also win the best BMI index of the league. Sorry Steve. Todd Delcambre - instead of “as the world turns” this one is titled “as the toss goes”. Game was groomed as a junior for just this challenge and should be an asset to his Captain… purple teeth and all! Mike Lane - one syllable names are usually good tennis players. Counting on you Big Mike. Not sure how big he is but aren’t all Mike’s called Big Mike. Shawn Potter - hopefully he is a wizard on the tennis court. Burt may be the class of this draft line but Shawn can be number two. Steven Burgess - part of the youth movement in B IX. Will need all his athletic ability to hit with Vaughn but Swami believes he is still on the accent of his symbolic bell curve. Prove me right La tech! Skip Scoggins - Perfect spot for the skipper. Speaking of.. Maryann or Ginger ? Swami started out as a Maryann guy then switched to Ginger! Something about those red heads. May have been after I seen Maryann as an older women. Did not age gracefully. Swami recalling B I when the Skipper racked up points for his Captain and helping to capture first league title. Jay hoping for a duplication. David Oubre - Doc Oub new addition to Beantleague. Watched this guy compete on the copy cat league now has an opportunity to shine and never go back. Looking across the line should hold his own. Garett Philippi - has a name for TV and sports. Hopefully his sport is tennis. Although it sounds like a soccer name. Sorry…didn’t mean to stereotype your name. Mike Otillio - wild ass Mike will run through a brick wall before giving up a free point. Swami loves his competitive fire and will go to battle with him any day of the week. Keep pushing wild ass Mike (aka the other Otillio) Wayne Durr - the quiet guy adds depth to an already solid top to bottom line up. Swami has seen him Win against the players across his line so Captain Jay should be rewarded. Steve Toups - Sweaty Steve finally rewarded for the hard work he has put in to relinquish Mr irrelevant title. Team player who you can count on to always hustle and make great tail gate food. Now lay off of those low back hand volleys and make Jaybo proud. Swami says grade is an A. Noah, Middle of the line up, and depth should have them in the title chase. And everyone knows the Saint of Saint Bernard plays for the title 80% of the time in Bentleagues. Swami has his money on the S of S! — Smash City Captain Dave Groucho Marks McGuire Nick Thompson - first selection. Calculated risk rewarded counting on the Ego being available at 2. Can these two compete against Noah and the Yoga Guy. Swami heard the bravado Tuesday so all that is left is to back it up. Swami believes Tricky has the game but wonders why he can only win with Alise and hasn’t had previous Bentleague success. Mark Fair - Drago…I mean Ego still seeking accolades from the masses. Self proclaimed first rounder given a reprieve with Tricky holding top dog moniker. Can he really be Pippen to Captain Dave’s MJ (Nick). Usually is a slow starter so Groucho needs to light a fire under him from the get go. Grant Matherne - new name in the top three. Tricky real proponent of Grant as an early round selection. Tricky and Ego didn’t have success as Captains so why Dave listening to them has Swami stumped. Blake Powers - man of mystery real asset in round 4. Will be a tough out week in and week out. Will be a key to a successful season and a point earner to take stress off of top two picks. Ronny Regouffre - aka the quiet assassin. Have seen him shine on numerous occasions but most of the time he was with Shane. Can he win without Shane remains to be seen. If with Blake I predict success, if with sixth and seventh round picks will have to be a top dog which may present challenges. Andrew McQuaid - at six Swami believes the Mayor over paid. Love him at 8 but at six raises questions. Should surprise newbies with athleticism for a big guy. big Burrito historically scores well but that is usually against lower round competitors Cayman Sinclair - The Cannon can fire haymakers with the best of them. Should be formidable withBig Burrito or Groucho. May also pair well with the squirrel. Swami predicting success and points looking at possible match ups. Kevin Phayer - Solid as they come at the net. Have to make the squirrel move side to side with those new hips to gain an advantage. Also susceptible to the lob (vertically challenged) so if paired with one of the biggies may be a cause for concern as they won’t be able to run down the lobs. Bentley Harvey - can this be the year Old Knees Harvey gets his name on the trophy? Dave playing the numbers believes Bentley at 9 is due. Swami says this team has a chance and Bentley may just be the catalyst. Will have success if playing line 4 or 5. Jeff St. Romain - has the game to rack up points if he keeps it between the white lines. Was impressed with pre season results and can benefit from a steady partner. Quality pick at 10 for sure. Sid Hauptmann - he of the 5.0 forehand. Swami also impressed with recent net play because that was always his Achilles. peeking Late in his tennis career but not surprising for a Parish boy. Mike Roberts - no information available at press time. Swami reserves the right to revisit. Seth Monaghan - Crazy eyes challenging Shane and Andrew for the “more athletic than he looks title. Can be a monster at the net or could hit 15 balls against the back fence in one set. Dr Jeckle /Mr Hide tennis game should improve as the season goes on! Chris Rabon - the Round Mound of Rabon not as round any longer. Swami knows he has been putting in the work on the side to side stepper. Captain Dave should be happy to get Chris at 14 and should be rewarded. Why Commish chose to make line scores different with so many forced pairings each round a mystery to me. Reminds me of a Cockamamie scoring system from years past. Robin Walker - Swami reserves the right…blah blah blah Jared Williams - Swami had this guy on his team in a past Bentleague and he scored points. Has the shots and the tennis IQ but sometimes hits himself out of games. If he plays four matches he will win 3. Chandler Courreges - too bad Joey is not on this team! C squared will get a chance to impress the Swami in due time. Kenny Boudreaux - skilled in numerous sports but Tennis not at the top. Sorry Kenny B. Swami does know that he won’t be out worked. Hits with the wrong hand sometimes which is confusing. Paul Guidotti - with a name like Guidotti bet the house this guy will compete. He’ll take a few to the train station en root to more victories than losses. I see a Toups Guidotti battle royal on the horizon. Swami says draft grade is B+ Ego has something to prove with Doctor Death going in round 1. Only see three singles players on this team so that will be their down fall. — Spin Doctors harry Hal Neitzchman- Captain Ed Dauterive - One Doctor to another…if this was a Mensa challenge this team would win. Only items missing are Doc Eck and Oub. And don’t even think about Peter on the wait list. I Dont see PHD on his signature line. harry counting on Ed stepping it up. Swami sees too many distractions hurting his tennis game side tracking Dr Death’s meteoric rise. Was first round selection. To high. Hunting Fishing, boating etc. excursions may hinder ability to perform as top dog. Swami predicts he’ll be relying on Will a lot. Will Gement - speaking of..has the game to play with Russell Noah and Nick. Also has a game on the accent. High value at 2 and should do well across his line counterparts. Especially the overrated Ego. Michael Schwartz - Swami likes Sargeant Schwarts’ game but can’t understand why he doesn’t score better in Bentleague. Will have to earn points to justify third round selection. Draft position may hurt captain Hal but Swami’s biggest question is if can can score points across his line if he is needed to beat the player player on his team. Riddle me this Batman…Would you pay to have 3 of top 9 or 4 of top 12? Steve Jacobs - pretty early for the tanned one in Swami’s mind but looked great in pre season. Box jumps keeping this guy at his fighting weight and challenges at a high level. Will appreciate some different partners and match ups but we’ll see if he validates round fourth round selection. Is he really the same age as Old Knees? Availability always an issue but if in the line up weekly should pair well with spots one higher and one lower. Asking any more with cooler months coming not advised. Greg Gorden - another one whose game should garner more points. In fact one year I think he went winless. How is that even possible with this guys forearms. On par with other line mates but shies away from longer rallies and the grinders knowing fourth shot has a 76 % chance of landing out or hitting the fence. Mike Mesa - I remember when Mikey was a first round selection. Will definitely benefit from sixth round draft slot. Swami foresees excellent pairings with Chong Gordon and most likely Ray B formerly known as Super Ray. Brad Humphreys - Is the serve back? Swami says it is better but not back so hard to live up to seventh round selection. Word is he questioned current draft slot but really needs a number one to his number to to prevail. I Dont see Buddy the Elf Newton on this team so who is going to carry Principal Belding. Ray Brouillette- Super Ray battling Father Time but still has the game to earn points. I take it back if he gets paired with the principal. Glad he is with us even though he is walking like Bentley lately. David Parnell - another guy with a great forehand. Depending on the scouting report can earn his Captain a lot of points slotted at 9. If opponent’s read the scouring report will be lucky to win 50% of his matches. Thomas Dominque - Young Lefty getting better and better. Usually has success but also accustomed to a lower draft spot. Will practicing with Nick and the other youngsters translate into w’s. Swami believes so. Swami sees a lot of Medvedev in this guy. Look for the drop shot Thomas …everyone wants to see those volley’s VS that sweet lefty forehand. Joey Dunbar - Should have been paired with Chandler Bing. Lefty’s game is powerful. Trot him out on the add side and tell him to hit heavy forehands. If you find his back hand you may have a chance. Burt Dalton - if the former Tinder king works his way back from Equador Swami says he is definitely the steal of the draft at 12. Single handily raised draft grade up a level for Captain Hal. How did he last this long on draft night. Vaughn Pizzaotola - Class of the 2nd tier athletes this year Swami likes his power and finesse. If Andrew played smart he would be Vaughn. A little Swami advice for Hal…try to get this guy in your line up weekly. Will over power competition on lines 4 and 5 and may be line three worthy when Brad loses confidence in his awkward service motion. Tyler Harper - Token Tyler is still playing tennis? Glad to have the former champion captain back even if he almost single handedLy lost a title by putting himself in every match as captain. Not sure how much he has been playing but I am sure he will be walking with confidence having secured that coveted title. Doug Autin - Three titles in the books for Bogalusa Doug. One behind his teammate Brad. Sorry to tell you this but Swami doesn’t see a need to make room in your trophy case this year. Vic Morlas - Vicious Vic has the tennis IQ to earn points even if his EIQ is lacking. Should be a high value earner for Captain Hairy Hal on line 4 or 5. Josh Clark - racked up points as a late season replacement in years past. Definitely top tier across his draft line. Remember this guy wearing Joker’s exact outfit in the clay for men’s tennis! Glad you stopped doing that Josh. Cameron Zipp - a little advice from the Swami - Bam Bam Cam keep hitting the ball hard. Stop with the finesse shots. Try to hit it as hard as Alise’s back hand and Captain Hal will be thrilled. Every time. You might just be the next Andrew . Devin Smith - name sounds like a corner back VS. A tennis player’s name. Good thing you will be playing with no expectations coming in as Mr. Irrelevant. If you get one or more wins you will exceed expectations. And if you get those wins against Toups I am going to be very upset. Swami says draft grade is a C. Fourth place for the fourth position in the draft. Unless Hairy Hal can dominate the Captain rounds the winning team will definitely thank you for your donation. —— There you have it! Title chase is on between Net Prophets and the Lobbyist! No surprises here since they were in the top two draft positions. See you on the courts! St. Bernard Swami OUT!